Dear Husband

i know, i know. I'm not married and its a couple years off but its definitely one of those things i am thinking about when my mind drifts off during 4th period English. 

All these questions come to my mind: What will he looks like? Wait, do i already know him? i mean 80% of people marry someone they knew in high school.. Is he one his mission right now? Is he going to be tall (tall boys are my weakness)? does he think about me or how he needs to prepare himself to be married?

Then i start picturing our life. Us in a cute two story home with a white picket fence, he comes home from work and i have dinner all made and ready (i need to start learning how to cook. thank the heavens for pinterest!) and then i begin thinking of our names for a children. If you're a girl and say you've never done that than you're lying(;

well as it's easy to tell i have spent a lot of time thinking about these things and a little over a year ago i decided "hey, why not tell him about these things"

again, i know i'm not married but its never too early to start preparing!

I started writing letters to him when i was about 15 and haven't stopped since and i plan on giving them to him the night before our wedding

Here are my most recent three.

I write a lot about the struggles i am going through and how I'll always remember to think of him and how he is the bigger picture.

I've wrote to him about the things i have given up because i know they wont lead me to him and I've even said a couple things to him about my first "break up"

" You're my goal and my motivator. With out knowing that i have someone I'm going to spend eternity with, this struggle I'm going through would be way harder. I'm making decisions in my life now to guide me toward you. I'm understanding that i need to go through heartbreak now so when I am with you i will understand the pureness of our love. I know this pain I'm going through is a blessing in disguise because soon I'll never have to feel it again because I'll find you, my eternal companion."

That was a little chunk from my most recent letter to him.

Not all my letters are so serious though. I have a couple that are me just joking around being a typical teenage girl and telling him I'm so excited to meet him and what not.

These letters aren't just for him but me too. They remind me to stay positive and to work for that happiness i want us to have. I've been upset over a boy for the past couple months (MONTHS, i know! like come one that's way too long!) but whenever a memory about us or eagerness to just text him and remind him of everything that used to be i think of my husband. The One that will love me forever, not just like me for a couple weeks, The One that will treat me like a princess, The One that will comfort me in my darkest of times, and The One who will go to any lengths to protect my virtue and is eager to find eternal life with me.

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I always end my letters in a silly way and remind him how much i love him and how i cant wait for out wedding day. I also remind him that he is in my prayers every night. Praying that he is doing what is right and preparing himself for me as i am for him, i pray that he is doing what our heavenly father is asking him and is preparing for or is on his mission bringing the knowledge of truth to everyone he meets.

My future husband is my ultimate goal and motivator and i cant wait to begin falling in love with him.

Stay positive

XX

PS want to hear something funny about these letters?? Well on one of my first ones i wrote when i was younger i drew a funny little doodle of how our life will go and what not and for our first date i drew us on a farris wheel and wrote "step one: cheesy first date" Well! my very first date EVER the guy took me on a ferris wheel! haha could you imagine me dying on the inside??